Here I Stand

I've been writing a lot. Mostly just to de-stress and get some mixed emotions out. But there's one thing that I'm writing that's particularly hard to do. I'm writing out my deepest darkest secret to give to Alix to read. The crazy thing is that this secret has never been told to anyone. Period. So it's kinda scary. Cause I'm trying to write it and I'm trying to explain so many things, I just don't know where to even start. One teacher in high school told me to just write, edit later. Sound familiar? It wouldn't if you don't go to University of West Georgia or read their paper. Yea, I was Writer of the Week sometime last year. ANYWAYS. I'm scared. I really think that I am thinking the worse and hoping for the best. I don't know, I'm just scared that this might change the way she thinks of me or looks at me. And I don't want it to change. I love Alix more than anything in this world and for me to tell her what I'll be telling her is a HUGE risk for me. But I promised her that I would never lie to her and I feel that by keeping this secret from her, that I would be breaking that promise and I don't think I can live with myself any longer knowing all this. I....am going to shut up now.